The Orthopedic specialist suggested I have a plate placed over my clavicle. The ill fitted jig saw puzzle still looks the same. As amazing as the human body is, it apparently has some difficulty auto-magically realigning bones on it’s own. It’s an out patient surgery so relatively minor (as far as surgeries go). But I’ll be going “under” and under the knife. A little freaked out. Just a little. So for my sake let’s take tally of the newly acquired benefits I’ll receive.

1. The ability to refract lasers off my collar bone.
2. Possibly pick up radio transmissions from space.
3. Hoist large buses off of accident victims.
4. 1% closer to becoming fully bio-mechanical (for the oncoming repressive robotic government).
5. Opportunity to get up close & personal with the metal detection wand operator at the airport.

If I left any out let me know.